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once more with feeling
Just got back from being re-hospitalized.
They call it an ambulatory procedure, except I had to stay in the hospital again. I'd lost too much blood and retained placenta. So all the sickness I'd been feeling after leaving the hospital the first time wasn't just me being weak after a difficult birth.
I got a transfusion, antibiotics, fluids, a lot of drugs and no sleep--you know you don't really sleep in hospitals right? How does anyone get well?
They gave me the option of getting more blood since after being on the vampire bag all night I was still only at 8.5 (12 is normal)but told me I could also go home if I took it easy.
We came home. I've officially reached my limit. It seems like this birth has gone on forever. I honestly can't take any more. I just want to get on with the process of making this family. I want to enjoy Emily and James.
James wouldn't leave me, so he and Emily camped out in the hospital room with me overnight. I feel so guilty for putting them through this--I want to be spoiling them not being taken care of like a hothouse flower. He was so scared for me (apparently I was really sick) and had to take over almost all the Emily wrangling. He's such a wonderful man--I know without a doubt that he is my protector, my friend and a love beyond comprehension. It's incredible to know that someone loves you that deeply. I know I'll do anything to be worthy of that love and to return it.
I can't sit down and type this, so it's back to the couch for me.
I so hope the bad part is over now.
And yes, we are only having one child.
They call it an ambulatory procedure, except I had to stay in the hospital again. I'd lost too much blood and retained placenta. So all the sickness I'd been feeling after leaving the hospital the first time wasn't just me being weak after a difficult birth.
I got a transfusion, antibiotics, fluids, a lot of drugs and no sleep--you know you don't really sleep in hospitals right? How does anyone get well?
They gave me the option of getting more blood since after being on the vampire bag all night I was still only at 8.5 (12 is normal)but told me I could also go home if I took it easy.
We came home. I've officially reached my limit. It seems like this birth has gone on forever. I honestly can't take any more. I just want to get on with the process of making this family. I want to enjoy Emily and James.
James wouldn't leave me, so he and Emily camped out in the hospital room with me overnight. I feel so guilty for putting them through this--I want to be spoiling them not being taken care of like a hothouse flower. He was so scared for me (apparently I was really sick) and had to take over almost all the Emily wrangling. He's such a wonderful man--I know without a doubt that he is my protector, my friend and a love beyond comprehension. It's incredible to know that someone loves you that deeply. I know I'll do anything to be worthy of that love and to return it.
I can't sit down and type this, so it's back to the couch for me.
I so hope the bad part is over now.
And yes, we are only having one child.
no subject
I've got a candle lit for you hun...
(oh yeah, and the pics of Emily were adorable. Such a profound personality already evident in those eyes! She's gorgeous.)