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freaked
so this morning we go in to have a procedure that may bring on contractions. I am freaked. I am as ready as I can be to have Emily out and about but of course I'm terrified. We could end up at the hospital tonite or in a few days for even more induction procedures.
And I feel like I have 6 million things to do before we can go, but I know that's not true. I've had myself on a schedule for getting things done the last three months. The house has to be clean though. If I come back to even a slightly messy house with a new baby,sore nether regions and precipitous hormone drop I'll wig out. One good thing about being old is you know yourself better. At least I keep a generally clean and organized house so it shouldn't take too much to get it where I want it.
I've done a lot of scary things in my life. This just might be the scariest. I also can't back out, no matter how I might want to at any one point. Oddly that's helpful.
And then I wonder when I get her home will I know enough to do...Like how humid do you keep a baby's room? How often do you snort her nose with that nose snorter thing? Can you use baby wipes on the right away or should I wait until she's bigger?
Please god don't let her be allergic to cats (still if she is we will find a way around that).
And there is this : http://www.msnbc.com/news/718394.asp. And we are getting a second air purifier.
I'm all over the map hmm...
That's just the way it's going to be . I've been organized and calm enough the last ten months. If I freak a little at this point I guess I do.. So I'll apologize upfront--If I'm weird or not paying attention or say something stupid, please bear with me , my brain is firmly lodged in my uterus right now.
And I feel like I have 6 million things to do before we can go, but I know that's not true. I've had myself on a schedule for getting things done the last three months. The house has to be clean though. If I come back to even a slightly messy house with a new baby,sore nether regions and precipitous hormone drop I'll wig out. One good thing about being old is you know yourself better. At least I keep a generally clean and organized house so it shouldn't take too much to get it where I want it.
I've done a lot of scary things in my life. This just might be the scariest. I also can't back out, no matter how I might want to at any one point. Oddly that's helpful.
And then I wonder when I get her home will I know enough to do...Like how humid do you keep a baby's room? How often do you snort her nose with that nose snorter thing? Can you use baby wipes on the right away or should I wait until she's bigger?
Please god don't let her be allergic to cats (still if she is we will find a way around that).
And there is this : http://www.msnbc.com/news/718394.asp. And we are getting a second air purifier.
I'm all over the map hmm...
That's just the way it's going to be . I've been organized and calm enough the last ten months. If I freak a little at this point I guess I do.. So I'll apologize upfront--If I'm weird or not paying attention or say something stupid, please bear with me , my brain is firmly lodged in my uterus right now.
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